Dance Floor Lessons: Women Over 55 Letting Go of Perfection
We can’t master every step — in dance or in life. But we can learn to flow, laugh, and trust the music.
This week, I explore how women over 55 find peace through imperfection.
Week Five brought a powerful lesson: you can’t control everything — and you don’t have to. For women over 55, this week’s class revealed how letting go of perfection can create strength far beyond the dance floor through self-compassion, flow, and presence. Through laughter, pain, and a few fast diagonals, I learned that joy lives in letting go.
A Preamble: Letting Go of Perfection
This week, I learned that sometimes you can’t push harder — you have to let go.
For women over 55, letting go is a lesson that shows up everywhere: in sore muscles, in tangled choreography, and in the quiet realization that control and peace rarely coexist in the same space.
Musings on the Way to Class
It was a warm October night — the kind where the air smells faintly of barns and the leaves shimmer in the fading light. The full Harvest Moon was rising, and my mind was a swirl of anxiety and fatigue.
This past week, I’d over-stretched my right leg — and I was still paying for it. Tightness, pain, and soreness that radiated through my groin, hamstring, thigh, and knee. The lesson was clear: take it slow and easy. Listen to your body.
I did my couch stretch that morning — gently, intentionally — and reminded myself that self-care doesn’t mean pushing; it means tuning in. I even took Advil before class, something I once resisted as “cheating.”
I was also thirsty, craving fruit — a subtle nudge from my body to replenish. Maybe dehydration was the culprit. Maybe anxiety. Or maybe it was simply another sign to slow down.
And then, that old friend guilt appeared. Guilt for not practicing enough. Guilt for “falling behind.” But guilt, I realized, doesn’t serve me. So I let it go.
By the time I started driving, something shifted. I daydreamed. I felt a little lighter. A little freer.
It was a warm October night — the kind where the air smells faintly of barns and the leaves shimmer in the fading light. The full Harvest Moon was rising, and my mind was a swirl of anxiety and fatigue.
By the time I started driving, something shifted. I daydreamed. I felt a little lighter. A little freer.
In the Studio
The class began with laughter — as it always does. Jen, my daughter and our dance teacher, brings joy to everything she does. My classmates are fun, supportive, and full of life.
The question at the start of class was: “Who would you like to invite to class?”
My answers came quickly: Margaret Trudeau, David Bowie, Mark Carney, and his wife, Diana Fox Carney. Imagine that lineup!
The pace was fast. The floor was sticky. My leg ached. I felt a little ‘lumbery’, especially during the diagonals. Still, I danced. I smiled. I showed up.
We learned new choreography — sort of. And Jen reminded us that this session has only two weeks left before we move on to new material. I felt a little sad. I wanted to master it.
But then Jen said something that landed deeply:
“That’s dance. It’s always changing.”
And I replied, “Like life.”
It hit me: we never really get to master it — dance or life. Both keep moving. Both keep shifting.
That’s when I decided: I’m not going to sweat it. I’m not going to chase perfection. I’m going to relax, allow, and flow.
That is my overriding lesson this week.
The class began with laughter — as it always does. Jen, my daughter and our dance teacher, brings joy to everything she does. My classmates are fun, supportive, and full of life.
It hit me: we never really get to master it — dance or life. Both keep moving. Both keep shifting.
This post is part of my ongoing series, Lessons from the Dance Floor, where I share stories from my adult jazz dance class—and the surprising life lessons they reveal.
Each week, I explore how movement, music, and a beginner’s mindset can help women over 55 confront self-doubt, rediscover joy, and live with intention. This is Week Four.
Lessons from Week Five
1. Control What You Can, Let Go of the Rest
I can control my preparation, my mindset, and my effort — but not everything else. For women over 55, releasing perfectionism, the goal isn’t control; it’s trust.
💡 The article from Psychology Today, on letting go of perfectionism, explains how striving for flawlessness drains joy, while self-compassion creates resilience. How to Let Go of the Need to Be Perfect
2. Listen to Your Body — It Knows the Way
My leg pain was a loud, insistent teacher. The message: slow down, rest, stretch, hydrate. Perfection pushes. Wisdom listens. For women over 55, embracing self-care, learning to rest is as powerful as learning to move.
💡 Harvard Health reminds us that mindful movement improves both body and mood — but balance is key. How to reduce stress and anxiety through movement and mindfulness
3. Guilt Is Not Motivation
I spent too much time this week feeling guilty about not practicing enough. But guilt doesn’t create growth; it creates paralysis. The moment I released it, I felt a sense of relief. Progress, after 55, comes from self-compassion and consistency, not self-criticism.
💡 For more on reshaping mindset and breaking unhelpful loops, explore my Master Your Mindset Bundle.
4. Flow Is the New Perfection
When I decided to “let it flow,” everything softened — my body, my movements, even my mood. Dance became less about mastery and more about presence. For women over 55, letting go is freedom: enjoying the process, not chasing a flawless finish.
💡 Learn more about the power of presence in my Guide to Intentional Living.
I can control my preparation, my mindset, and my effort — but not everything else.
For women over 55, letting go is the goal, not control; it’s trust.
Musings on the Way Back
The moon was full and bright, lighting my way home. My leg still hurt, but my spirit was lighter.
I laughed out loud when a cyclist crossed the road ahead of me — the reflectors on their wheels made it look like a prancing horse. The universe has a sense of humour.
I’m proud of myself. Proud of showing up, laughing, and choosing flow over frustration. I’m proud that I’m mastering night driving. Proud that I’m getting out of the house more.
Next week, I’ll focus on strength, flexibility, and calm. I’ll give up scrolling and news that adds drama instead of peace.
The thing is to show up. The thing is to flow. The thing is to be.
The moon was full and bright, lighting my way home. My leg still hurt, but my spirit was lighter.
The thing is to show up. The thing is to flow. The thing is to be.
Practical Takeaways for You
If you’re learning to let go of perfection after 55, here are three ways to begin:
Trade control for curiosity. When something goes “wrong,” ask what it’s trying to teach you.
Listen inward. Your body is always communicating. Rest, hydrate, breathe.
Choose joy over judgment. Celebrate effort, not outcome. Flow creates freedom.
For inspiration, read my earlier post on Women Over 55 Finding Joy.
An Invitation
If perfectionism has kept you from enjoying your progress, it’s time to shift your rhythm. My Master Your Next Chapter Bundle can help you release pressure and rediscover purpose.
👉 Explore the guide here.
Final Encouragement
Life, like dance, doesn’t wait for us to master it. The steps keep changing. The rhythm keeps moving. The trick is to stay in it — to let go, breathe, and flow.
So here’s to women over 55 letting go of perfection — one class, one breath, one moonlit drive at a time.
❓ FAQ: Women Over 55 Letting Go of Perfection
Why is perfectionism such a challenge for women over 55?
After decades of caring, leading, and proving, many women over 55 struggle to release control. However, perfectionism can drain joy and block creativity. Letting go creates room for curiosity and peace.
What does “flow” mean in this context?
Flow means trusting the process — moving with life’s rhythm rather than resisting it. For women over 55, it is about embracing flow, which is characterized by presence, acceptance, and ease.
How can I tell if I’m pushing too hard?
When your body aches, your mood dips, or guilt replaces joy, you’re pushing past what serves you. Listen inward. Rest, breathe, and remember — progress is gentler than pressure.
What’s one mindset shift that helps women over 55 release perfectionism?
Replace “I must get it right” with “I’m learning as I go.” That small change rewires your inner dialogue toward growth and grace.
How does self-compassion help women over 55 thrive?
According to the Greater Good Science Center, self-compassion fosters resilience and emotional balance, enabling you to live with greater authenticity and joy. The Power of Self-Compassion
NOTE: To check out my newest article on Medium, please click this link: Dance Diaries: Week Five — Learn to Go with the Flow and Control What You Can. We can’t master every choreography — in class or in life. But we can learn to move with grace, let go of perfection, and trust the rhythm to lead us forward.
👉 I thoughtfully use AI tools to polish my writing, but every story comes from my lived experience. The dance class is real, the laughter is mine, and the lessons are shared with you in the hope they spark joy and reflection in your own journey.